When am I ever going to really look after myself? I seem to be able to start but I struggle on the long term part. We have a lot going on at the moment but I also have a million reasons not to.
Lately I have not been looking after myself as well as I should have been. My eating has been okay but not the best.
I am not exercising.
I am not loving myself at all.
I do not believe in myself.
I dont not haver confidence in myself.
But this has to stop now.
The main sign that I am finding that I am not looking after myself is that my thoughts of self harm, of cutting my wrists, is back and becoming quite consistent. I keep thinking about the reason why I am feeling these urges again is because I just want something physical to hurt to take my mind from what is going internally. I am totally overwhelmed with life and where it is heading.
But no matter what I am chanting to myself that I am not going to let myself sink into depression. NO BLOODY WAY.
Trying to loose this weight is not easy. But I know most of it is based on my mental well being.
So I am going to take responsibility for my actions and I am going to loose the weight.
The most important thing I have learnt is that you need to make the goals at the start achieveable even if you feel that they are small. If you feel like you are succeeding, you are more likely to keeping succeeding.
So my first goals are to:
- Say my goals everyday
- Measure my breakfast
- Exercise for 30 minutes everyday.

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